Have you been to a funeral ceremony which was led by a funeral celebrant? Has a friend or family member mentioned a funeral celebrant? Do you know somebody who has stated they are training to become a funeral celebrant? What is a funeral celebrant?
Different Kinds of Funeral Celebrants
There are different kinds of funeral celebrants, just as there are different kinds of people. There are specific religion celebrants including Pagan celebrants, spiritual celebrants, celebrants who won’t say anything religious, non-religious celebrants, alternative celebrants, and traditional celebrants.
The Role of a Funeral Celebrant
A funeral celebrant is somebody who should be professionally trained to write and deliver various kinds of funeral ceremonies, celebrations of life, scattering and burial of ashes, memorial and remembrance ceremonies for babies, children, teenagers, and adults.
The role of a funeral Celebrant is to help the family or people of a person who has died to celebrate that life, acknowledge death has happened and to say goodbye in a ceremony. A family, person or people have given the funeral celebrant (usually a stranger) the honour of telling the life story of that person to those who attend the ceremony.
Funeral celebrants are authors, narrators, story tellers, informers of facts, sometimes family mediators if relationships between members are strained and at times much more. Celebrants who have successfully completed a funeral celebrant training course link to Choice’s one will have knowledge off different kinds of funerals and family situations, how to support those they are working for and how to be part of the team involved in the ceremony.
Good celebrants should make appropriate suggestions and help every family or person who is planning a funeral make the right choices for their needs. We inform and reassure people their choices are ok as what is called ‘tradition’ can be outdated and of it’s past time.
Informing a family who have said their loved one liked Bob Dylan or Led Zeppelin these artists music can be chosen to be played at the funeral ceremony is what a funeral celebrant should do. ‘Can we hear/read/listen to/wear…’ are common requests. ‘Can we do that?’ is a commonly heard question.
The role of the funeral Celebrant is to help a family say goodbye to a loved one by commemorating and acknowledging the life of their family member and this should and can include music and wording of their choice (if it isn’t offensive or hurtful to others. Swearing in songs and poems is acceptable; within reason).
The Difference Between a Professional, Trained Funeral Celebrant and an Untrained Funeral Celebrant
As an experienced wedding and funeral celebrant trainer for the last nine years, (who has trained over 460 celebrants) and a celebrant for nearly ten years the one thing that stands out is a badly or untrained celebrant who talks about their own feelings or makes personal references during a ceremony.
As there currently are any recognised qualifications or criteria to becoming a funeral celebrant anyone can decide to say they are a celebrant without having any training. How would this make you feel when you need a funeral celebrant? Would you feel more reassured with the knowledge the celebrant creating your person’s ceremony has paid to be trained as a funeral celebrant, or would you be happy to hear a name changed templated script easily found online?
Templated scripts with the same generic, irrelevant, and sometimes meaningless wording used for every person are a trait of a bad and unprofessional celebrant. It is a celebrant’s job to gather information from those closest to the person who has died, ask questions, make suggestions, and create a bespoke ceremony. Using the same wording isn’t bespoke, it is templated.
Every ceremony should have completely different wording to the last funeral they wrote (rather than just changing the names and adding a few paragraphs about the life story of the person as so many untrained or badly trained funeral celebrants seem to do). Every ceremony should be about the life of the person who has died and specifically created for that person. So specific that it hasn’t been nor could be ever used again for another person.
What a Funeral Celebrant Should Wear
There are some celebrant affiliations who make suggestions as to how a funeral celebrant should dress, which of course isn’t acceptable nor should it be happening. One suggested a female celebrant should wear ‘a moderate heel’ in relation to footwear. This celebrant wears Doc Martens, more than ‘a moderate heel’, trainers, leopard print shoes and clothing, Viking clothing, Pagan dresses, robes, band t-shirts, football t-shirts, cloaks, gothic attire, Victorian dress and has dressed in Elvish clothing to lead a natural burial ceremony for a Lord of the Rings fan.
Funeral celebrants aren’t required to wear a uniform of a business suit (nor a name badge as this isn’t a requirement nor is it relevant), neck scarves, long sleeves, jackets, cover tattoos (those days are long over thankfully) or have ‘normal’ hair colours (unless a family request any of these things and the celebrant is accepting of their requests).
Whatever clothing or accessories guests are requested to wear, the funeral celebrant should also wear the same. By declining to do as requested or invited, it could be seen as the ideas are wrong or unacceptable. The traditional funeral colour of black isn’t for everyone, certainly not for the funerals of babies and children from personal experience.
However, casual clothing such as jeans and t-shirts, vest tops, jogging bottoms, shorts, open footwear, or hats aren’t acceptable attire for a funeral celebrant, unless requested. Funeral celebrants may need to wear sunglasses for ceremonies held outdoors.
What a Funeral Celebrant is
As previously mentioned, a funeral celebrant is a professional writer and a narrator, a storyteller and a somebody who help those present to hold ceremonial space. We are fact finders and fact givers, and whether religious or atheist, traditional or alternative, independent, or affiliated, our job is to create personalised ceremonies of goodbye and in celebration of each life. Our role is to be supportive, guiding, and to be the voice platform of each family or person we work for.
Each funeral celebrant offers a personal ceremony, but make sure what they are offering is right for you as we only have one chance to say goodbye.
For further information or to book me as a funeral celebrant, please contact me.